Apples of Gold

We have all seen the commercials. An elderly person lies helplessly on the floor, injured and unable to get up on their own. They utter the infamous phrase: “I have fallen and I can’t get up”. The acting could usually benefit from a bit of help, too. Unfortunately these situations are all too real not only physically, but also spiritually. I think if we are honest, most of us have either been there or are currently in a situation that we cannot find our way out apart from the help of God.

I recently found myself running on empty. My schedule has imploded this year and I find myself in a constant state of busyness. Whether it is from endless trips-even for ministry, or the serious renovations we are doing on our new home, my time has been seriously overbooked. The result of this is inevitably not investing in my relationship with God enough. I realized how much I do not like the unsanctified version of myself. My tongue, my temper, and my view of those around me are all negatively affected. It gives me hope to realize that one of the most effective Apostles in Scripture also struggled with this stuff.

In Romans 7 Paul writes: “And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do what is right, but I can’t. I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway.” Vs 18, 19

In other words, “I have fallen and I can’t get up”! I can’t just be a good person. I can’t be like Jesus on my own. I am desperately in need of a Savior, not just for entrance into heaven but each and every day of my life. When we are walking close to God it can be difficult to distinguish between His grace and mercy flowing through us and our own strength and abilities. Sometimes this brings us to a place where we start to coast in our walk with God. Rather than pressing in, we just take things for granted. It doesn’t take long for our rough edges to begin to show when we are not allowing the Holy Spirit control of our lives.

Sometimes it takes a glimpse of our true nature for us to realize just how much we still have to work on. My unsanctified reflection wasn’t pretty. It was painful and embarrassing. I am thankful though; because by seeing it I realized again that I do not want to be like me, I want to be like Jesus. We live in a world that constantly bombards us with the idea that my wants and needs come first. Success and even importance is often defined by popularity, position and influence. This is not the way Jesus taught us.

Matthew 23:11 The greatest among you must be a servant.

This does not tend to be modeled well in our American church world. The more influence one has the more they tend to diminish the role of servant and instead expect to be served. Jesus doesn’t stop with reminding us that we must be a servant, the next verse gives us a sober warning:

But those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted. (Vs 12)

When I was in high school I was attending graduation, probably for my older brother who was a year ahead of me in school. It was outside and I had on a nice light colored dress and a pair of pretty high heels. I was standing on the top of a grass covered hillside that was apparently a little wet. I found myself “skiing” down the hill in the tuck position in front of a rather large crowd on the bleachers behind me. Thankfully I didn’t actually fall-although I did manage to get some lovely grass stains on my dress. That was pretty embarrassing. Falling, or slipping tends to be. Doing it in full view of a crowd of your peers only magnifies it. I’m not sure anyone around me even noticed, and I stood up very quickly once I reached stable ground. Had I been paying more attention I probably could have avoided the whole scenario.

We need to be certain that we are paying attention to what we are doing. Keeping our spiritual footing is difficult when our minds are on everything but spending time with God and dying to ourselves. I’m so thankful for a loving Father who patiently watches me stumble down the wrong path and offers me His hand when I finally realize that I have fallen and I can’t get up.

My prayer is encapsulated well in the old hymn Breathe on Me Breath of God, written by Edwin Hatch in 1878:

Breathe on me, Breath of God, fill me with life anew, that I may love the way you love, and do what you would do.

Breathe on me, Breath of God, until my heart is pure, until my will is one with yours, to do and to endure.